I was due to see a man called Attila, who would do something called a “sinus-lifting bone graft” and a “bone augmentation”, before screwing some “abutments” into newly drilled holes. It didn’t sound nice. It sounded even less nice when Attila the Hun-garian told me he had bad news. I know, I wanted to say. Our political situation is now almost as bad as yours!
Columns, features, interviews, book reviews, Brexit blog
Christina writes mostly for The Sunday Times, The Guardian and The Daily Mail. She was at The Independent for 10 years, where she wrote a column twice a week and did “The Christina Patterson interview”. She has also written for The Observer, Time, The Spectator, New Statesman, the TLS, Literary Review, High Life, Intelligent Life and HuffPost. She will only write if she is properly paid.
Our Prime Minister lied to the Queen. He lies all the time, of course, so there’s nothing all that surprising in this, but what is a bit unusual is that at 10.30 this morning the Scottish Court of Session, which is the Supreme Court of Scotland, actually ruled that the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom lied to the Queen.
The new, improved report, which Michael Gove is planning to release under pressure from the opposition, will be much nicer. All the scary bits are going to be toned down. It will, apparently, be “soft soap”. Practically a bubble bath. “Me time”, with a nice glass of chardonnay and some Classic FM.